For me, I’ve started to share my story on social media, in my book and on platforms like this one in hopes of inspiring others to learn to love their bodies. But I also understand not everyone is comfortable putting their life and body on display on the internet, and not everyone cares to make a career out of their passion for body positivity.
Even if you have no desire to proclaim your body confidence for the world to see, there are tons of ways you can honor your new-found body love, live a body positive life and make it easier to avoid slipping back into old habits.
Avoid Diet Talk and Body Shaming
For me, one of the biggest changes is refusing to engage in conversations about diet culture and body shaming. That means I don’t talk negatively about my own body or anyone else’s, not even in the privacy of my own home. It means when negative thoughts about my body or someone else’s pop up, I question them. I ask where those thoughts are coming from and let myself be uncomfortable when they come from deeply ingrained biases I’m still trying to unlearn.
It also means I don’t engage in conversations about diets or calories or “needing” to lose weight. I’m not quite brave enough, yet, to call family or friends out on their comments, but I do excuse myself from those conversations. If someone talks about good or bad food at work, I just don’t engage. If a friend or family member talks about the diet they are on or how much weight they need to lose, I stay quiet instead of asking questions or praising them for their efforts.
I Avoid Body-Based Compliments
Compliments on weight loss only reinforce fat phobia and the idea that smaller bodies are better, and I want nothing to do with upholding that harmful ideal. Stopping complimenting people on their bodies has been harder than I expected. There have been so many times the words, “You look so great! Have you lost weight?” have bubbled up to the surface and I’ve had to force them back down. Not because that person doesn’t look great, but because I don’t want to perpetuate the idea that their body looks better now that they’ve lost weight or that because they are now smaller they now deserve my praise.
I Buy Clothes that Fit, Regardless of What Size They Are
I no longer get stressed or cry if I need to buy a pair of jeans that are a size bigger. It’s impossible for me to feel confident or comfortable in my body when I’m wearing clothes that don’t fit. In the past, I avoided buying bigger clothes at all costs, even if that meant being uncomfortable in everything I wore. Now I buy clothes that fit and flatter my body and do my best to ignore the size on the label.
I Spend My Money at Body-Positive Retailers
It’s all well and good to talk about being body positive and inclusive of all bodies, but that message falls flat if I still spend my money at retailers that don’t support that ideal. That means even though I can find things that fit at stores like Victoria’s Secret, I no longer spend my money there. I choose to back and support brands that cater to a wider population, who support and showcase a body-inclusive message, and who share the same ideals about banishing fat phobia that I do.
It’s not always easy to be body positive in a world that tells us celebrating and loving curvy bodies equals promoting obesity, but I try my best to follow people on social media and share messages that align with those values. I make the choice every day to treat my body with love and respect, and to fight against the negative voices in my head and in the world that tell me I would be prettier or happier in a thinner body. It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it.
About the Author: Paige Fieldsted is the author of the highly acclaimed book Confessions from Your Fat Friend. She is also a blogger and body positivity advocate who believes all women deserve to love and appreciate the body they are in right now, and that people of all shapes and sizes are worthy of love and respect. Paige lives in Utah with her husband John, sons Mason and Logan, and Willy the pug. When she’s not writing, you can find Paige dancing and singing in the kitchen with her boys, doing yoga, hanging out with family or reading. Learn more about Paige here.
